(436 pages)

Feb 5, 2009




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The eerie full moon has made another visit upon the dark, clear, crisp night. It is the only light shining in a black naked sky. Even the lighthouses have taken a break from their daily duties of guiding lost ships through the abyss of the mysterious ocean that swallows its victims with no remorse. Shadows dance across the autumn leaves that are undergoing pigment changes as they prepare to fall making way to another dark and dreary winter.

I gaze out my window, which overlooks the forlorn harbor in the distance along with the backdrop of a rugged wilderness that holds many secrets. That is when I see her. Her beautiful apparition gracefully glides across the water like an angel dancing without a care in the world. She is dancing for me like she always used to do way back in the days; the days before she was stolen from me. The days we were so happy and in love. I was so foolish to think it would last. Nothing lasts forever. But I was also foolish to think that she was an angel. She was an angel draped in devil’s clothing. She cast me under her spell making me believe in her goodness and purity. Nobody is pure. Evil resides in us all. We are all capable of horrible things when pushed to the limit. But I never hurt her. I loved her with all my heart and soul and everything that I had. I gave her myself. Isn’t that the most valuable thing you could give anybody? Yet it wasn’t enough. Nothing was enough for her. She just kept taking, and then in the end came her betrayal. I will never trust anybody again. What’s the point? They only disappoint you and leave you with bitter memories to take to the grave.

Now she haunts me every night; dancing and taunting me with every move. The curvature of her body silhouetted against the moonlight driving me crazy and making me long for her warm, sultry skin against mine, wanting to taste the bitter sweetness of her candy lips. Why must I be tormented like this? What have I done to deserve such pain?

The only reconciliation is knowing I have taken my vengeance, well, part of it anyway. I am still waiting for the second part of my payback, but first there must be plenty of suffering. I want those who hurt me to suffer like they have made me suffer! I want them to live in anguish as they have made me all these months. Of course that is only half of my revenge. The other half will be the grand finale. After all, there comes a time in all our lives when we reach our own grand finale. That is when all pain and suffering ceases and all worries of this world are no more. That is the part we call death.

As I prepare for another lonely evening of restless slumber, I hear her moaning and wailing in the near distance. She is calling out my name beckoning me to approach her. Why? I don’t know. I thought she was through with me. But I guess some times when you’re a part of somebody’s soul; you never really are through with them.

I must answer her call. I slowly leave my melancholy room making sure to wrap myself in a sweater before going out into the cold night air. There she is; my goddess of beauty. The woman I have always loved and will forever love. I follow her voice and her gesture begging me to come closer and closer. I know I shouldn’t yet I cannot help myself. It is a force pulling me like a magnet and I can’t resist. Oh how I’ve tried but her allure is just too overwhelming for me. I knew she’d come back to me sooner or later. Even if it is in the afterlife I knew that she would eventually recognize the error of her ways. I was her one and only love; surely she had to know that. Yes she lost sight of that for a while but I knew she would return to her senses. It’s such a pity it’s too late. But isn’t that how it always works? One realizes the error of one’s ways when it is too late to turn back the clock.

“Is it really you?” I ask.

“Yes it’s me my darling,” she replies.

“Why? Why are you returning to torment me?” I cry in anguish. “I am trying to rid my heart of you and move on, but you won’t let me.”

“I love you,” she replies as her apparition dances across the water and moves toward the lighthouse before turning around and gesturing with her fingers for me to follow.

I obediently do so like a lost puppy following its master. In many ways that’s how it was when she was alive. She was the master of my heart and I obeyed her every command. She heads to our favorite hideaway; the abandoned lighthouse at the edge of the cliff. That’s where it all began and where it all ended. I go inside in a hurry, afraid I will lose her if I don’t keep up. She is in great shape, but then again, death has that affect. You are not restrained by the body’s limitations since your body is no more; turning into ashes again like how we were before our dear mothers gave us life.

I knew where she was taking me, of course - all the way to the top. I follow her up the dark winding staircase in silence. It is so cold and dank in there but I hardly notice. Once we get there, she heads to the window where she always loved to look out and stare at the harbor and the beautiful state of Maine. Her long flowing hair flowed in the breeze of the autumn air enchanting me and longing for me to reach out and caress those soft locks. But I know once I reach out to her I will only grasp air for she is not really there. It’s ironic because toward the end it was the same thing; I’d reach out to her only to discover that she was not really there.

“Why did you take me here?” I ask.

She doesn’t speak a word but merely points out the window where I careen my neck around her to peek.

There he is, walking along the harbor as he likes to do most nights while gazing at the moon and most likely visualizing her face. I nod in understanding now. “Yes,” I tell her. “he misses you too.”

“I want to be with him,” she whispers to me. “I am so sorry but I want to be with him. Please let me be with him.”

Of course I understand what she means as I look at her with disgust. “What about me? I wanted to be with you too and God help me I still do. There was a time you felt that way also.”

She says nothing but looks away back at him for that is where her heart truly belonged. “You realize what this means, don’t you?” I ask her. “What it means if I allow you two to be together? Is that all right with you?”

She turns to me in sadness and nods.

“But he is the reason you are dead,” I insist. “Yet you still want to be with him?”

Her silence answers my question. She was desperate for him; their souls were connected and the only way to make that connection complete was reuniting them. It is tempting, I have to admit, yet the only reason I hadn’t allowed it to happen in the first place was because I knew it was what she wanted and I didn’t want to grant her that satisfaction. But I also knew that she would continue to torment me until I did as she requested. I look through her silhouette back outside to him. He looks so pitiful out there all alone. I look back at her and ask, “You promise you’ll leave me alone for good once I do this for you?”

She nods.

I take a deep breath and sighed. “Fine, but it will be done on my time and in my way.”

She says nothing and soon fades into nothing; the same way she materializes. I am alone again with just my thoughts as I continue staring out the window. He is gone; vanished just like her. It won’t be long before he vanishes completely. She wants to be with him so badly, I will make it happen. Of course, the only way to do that is to rid the world of him-permanently. The next thing to do is plan his demise. Should it be painful and long or short and sweet? Should he suffer first or die at a moment’s notice with no time to prepare? Decisions, decisions. Well, nothing would be decided tonight. He had a long day ahead of him tomorrow and besides, he did not want to do it right away for he rather enjoyed her visits, which would soon cease once he carried out his plan. No, he wanted to see her a few more times. Then, when he gets sick of her, he’ll dispose of him and the two could share eternity forever as far as he was concerned; both burning in the eternal flames that he was sure would destroy whatever was left of their souls and he would be free of them - at least until he joined them.

- Copyright © 2013 Chrissy Yacoub, Chrissy Books All Rights Reserved -